Writer's Diarrhea

Bits of posts-posted all-in-one to stop spamming your inbox..social service you see..

Off late, have been reading many bloggers tea-table-talk about “writers block” Whom are we kidding here? It makes me feel I have a writers diarrhea syndrome.

Okay, back to the point.The first two posts stay put on my drafts for a long time, which is now edited and posted here. And in the last two posts I introduce to you my giggly girls gang-1.
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Post1: Hunger strike @home

11 a.m

War has indeed been declared. I am not planning to talk to anyone at home today or tomorrow or anytime in the near future. My sister is munching some chocolates which my mom had got after her trip to her home in Srilanka. I saw the fridge filled with chocolates. No no, I would not let me be tempted that easily.

11.20 a. m

Hunger strike. I am going to officially announce my hunger strike at home. This is the only way to make my sis and mom understand that I am not really okay with their impossible ways.

11.25:

Mom is making mutton biryani and chicken gravy. My sisie is doing something with the custard powder. Oh she must be getting some dessert ready.

11.35:

Mom is adding spices and ghee to the biryani. It smells .. ummm… delishus is the word.

11.37:

Hunger strike!!! Who did even think of that? Gandhiji? Anna hazare? It’s a test to my strong will . I will not give up..

11.45:

Stomach makes some weird noise. Ignoring it.
Is it hunger? Nope.. no never.. not that easily mel.

12:00

Mom announces that the biryani is put on dum and is ready to be eaten in next 15 mins

12.15:

Sis is right in front of me with the biryani on her plate. I move to the next room so that I could dodge the smell of those yummy yummy biryani

12.30

No matter where I go in my home, I cannot help but smell them. Moving to my neighbors place for some time.

12.35:

I just got settled with my plate of biryani and the juicy chicken. Uffff… mom has touched base with my weak point. Whatever it is, mom is at her best when it comes to biryanis

Ofcourse, I need not say, the hunger strike starts tmrw after my lunch. .

Post2:Rant alert:

Please read at your own risk.
I am far beyond intelligent, only crazy at times.decently educated, decently payed. Ofcourse, how does it matter when it cant get me a rich, very well educated business man who will forget his mom the second he sets his eyes on me?
Since I have reached the ripe age,i.e 23 and don’t have a handy boyfriend, my family including my younger sister, my cousins, my moms 9 other siblings, my dadas 8 other siblings, their families, their kutti potta kutties(Yes,my family multiplied like rabbits)and also my friends and even their friends have started me to hook me up to some random guy.
Ok confession : I am not 23
I am 24

Post3:Balloon shooting

So yesterday, given that it was a month end and cos all of us had turned paupers(read here) twenty days back- we decided to go to marina.

With only fifty rupees each, three of us walked towards the plank for shooting balloons and agreed on a deal. The one who guns down the minimum number of balloons will sponsor for the molaga bajjis to follow.
Me being the heroic of all, shot 7 out of ten..mind you, all targeted ones(no blind shooting)

Roomie2: shot 4/10
Roomie3: after 5 failed rounds, now looked at me with those sad eyes, like a puppy which needed help

I enter the scene now, and give her all the tiny details I knew about this shooting business.

As instructed, She aims at her half brown-half blue balloon. Holds her breath after she sets her target. Fires.
THUDDDD goes the lamp.

She missed her target and shot the lamp besides the balloon. After all the mercy pleading, we were made to sit like an accused in k3 police station.

What next? We had to call one of my roomies boyfriend so that her knight in shining armor came to rescue his damsel(s) in distress and not to forget,we all got our mollaga bajjis too

Post4:Guindy

Disclaimer: You might have to stop reading it here ,if you don’t like any nasty/gross/disgusting jokes.

P.S: Alert again, stop reading if you have any second thoughts about it and stop judging me once your done with your reading.

VENUE: My room

CAST: Anupa –My new malayali roomie Me: the same devilish person

Anupa: Melani, where is “gundy?”
Me:lol…*breaks into a fit of laughter*
Anupa: Whats wrong? *asks me with her jyothika like big eyes*
Me: Ask me again *continues laughing”
Anupa: where is “gundy?”

Finally, after all my laughing was over. I turned back to show her where “gundy” is. You get the drift?

Oh, please don’t give me that glare now ,for posting such cheap blogs it hurts

This and That

Being immersed in hell lot of work,I have no idea why I had an itch to blog. I ve been trying to find happiness in work since morning, and this is what I found.

Open a big folder
check its size
compress the folder
check the size now
voila, 7.25 MB to 653KB.

Don’t you feel like some magician?

On other news, I just pulled my hair to make a pony and found a big tag sticking to my new kurthi. That too with a big font screaming aloud”30% off”

Have been moving around like an headless chicken like this since morning…my colleagues must have confirmed that am some mad case left loose on the floor…

Sorry for wasting your time… time to unfollow me ,isn’t it?

When was the last time?

Posted by Edel Melani Rayan, Josephine

 

 

When was the last time, you danced for a song when you walked on the road listening to your favt beat?

When was the last time, you ducked out after throwing popcorns at your front row people in the movie hall?

When was the last time, you laughed out heartily that you almost had tears in your eyes and your stomach had started to ache?

When was the last time you sang to someone, though they knew that you were terrible when it comes to singing?

When was the last time, you spent a whole day with a kid-played with the kid,helped the kid dress, took the kid to closest store and bought everything it demanded for etc etc?

When was the last time you flew a flying kiss to a kid(or even a grownup for that matter)sitting in the car at a traffic signal?

When was the last time, you realized that the best things in life can’t be bought by money?

When was the last time, you flirted with someone?

When was the last time , you had your adrenaline rush?

When was the last time , you said “I love you “ to your mom and dad?

When was the last time you did something really really crazy that you would not share the incident with anyone?
 
When was the last time you were content with your life?

When was the last time, you sat doing nothing and not thinking about anything?

When was the last time you were happy for no reason at all?

We have only one dear life ,so live it to the fullest. Haan now what are you waiting for, go ahead and do it…

Till then,
Mel…

I Wish

I wish

Posted by Edel Melani Rayan, Josephine

+6

 

I wish

That we had a popcorn machine in our workplace

That I can stay at home and watch tv all day, but receive my pay slip every month end without fail

Or at least I can work at my ease, 3 days a week, 4 hours a day and get paid like the CEO

That I could eat everything I like and still manage to not get fat

That I could comb my hair and don’t find any hair sticking to my comb

That I stop beautifying ppts and start making an actual one

That my growing tummy decides to obey me from now on

That I open my wardrobe and always find something new and nice to wear everyday

That I never had to pay my credit card bills

That I had a lovely boyfriend who is romantic, knows how to cook, also has a good road and civic sense but vanishes every time I wanted to be with my girlies

That I never have to say good bye to anyone

That I came to office by helicopter every day ,skipping traffic

That everything on flipkart was for free

That someone sponsored a world trip for me and my girlies and also for my supervisor to grant me my long vacation leave

That I stop looking at someone’s nose when they are having a serious conversation with me

That every webpage I found interesting was not blocked here in office

That I could write a sensible blog for once

Am I asking for more?

Crap

Last week when I was home, mom pestered me and my sis to clean my cupboard which I had dumped with papers for last two years. Which included right from bus tickets to gems packet covers.

My sis said” you brought Crap for 1200 rupees”

The smart me answered” lol.. that’s what we have been doing for last ten years;-)”

Sis:”but who gives you a bill for that?”

Snatched the bill and turned it backside to see “Crepe salwar kameez”

What were you expecting?